Shame and the Shadow of God.

The cognitive dissonance between the miserable and violent Old Testament, Yahweh and the New testament version who was Well Pleased and Benign, has caused some of the flock confusion over the centuries.

Marcion of Sinope 144AD, averred there must be two gods and was driven out of town on a rail for his trouble. They must have been pretty serious about his eviction. Two thousand years later his spiritual descendants, the Ebonites, still live in desert mountain fortresses.

and not just because Yahweh is mean and carries Millenial grudges but because he moonlights as Mammon.

Its not that shocking. He’s split to the point of madness. When the Principle of Relatedness, symbolised by Yahweh’s ex-missus Hokmah/Sophia/Wisdom..

she wot got cast into the brine and done in with mill stones?

the very same. When She disappears back into the ocean, Humanity is easier to lead by the nose because people stop talking to one another from their hearts and have stopped talking to themselves, which, far from being the first sign of madness, is a rather good sign of I and Me having a productive chinwag.

The splash back for Yahweh is that he loses the capacity to talk to himself into the bargain and entertains no awareness of contradictions that give even mere mortals occasional pause for thought.

which is why Eternity is in love with the clocks of Time.

Unfortunately the Beloved has become a little schizoid. One of his dating handicaps is typical of the Narcissistic suitor who denies the relevance of potential rivals whilst being eternally chewn up with envy and vengeance. He’s split in the way crevasses are, the kind that can swallow you up…

the way kids are when their parents say one thing but do another.

One of his best is the claim to be the One and Only whilst pouring vats of divine libido into smiting the children of lesser gods, thereby acknowledging not only their existence but their worthiness of adversarial attention..

and occasional emulation..

It’s behavior that is entirely consistent with the malignant end of a Narcissistic Personality Disorder, the hallmark of which is continuous aggressive investment in the denigration and humiliation of others in a way that then justifies, for their own good, intrusive correction. So the shop front might be all love and peace and we’ll lead with that but in back is the treadmill of shame.

Guilt for what you have done is small potatoes, shame for what you take yourself to be goes to the bone.

For all our supposed advances we are a culture of  Job’s comforters, the neighbours of biblical Job who got pulverised by Yahweh as part of a bet with the Devil. When Job is reduced to sitting on a dungheap all covered in boils, his mates come over. Instead of commiserating, which you’d expect of even your harshest mate after being whacked by God through no fault of your own, they urge him to search his conscience. You must have done something wrong…

which gradually becomes…

there’s something wrong with you.

You can’t feed a baby on a park bench without people tutting. If your picket fence didn’t get a lick of paint at Easter you’ll be tutted to Thanksgiving. You can’t even die of old age or natural causes anymore. You must have bought it on yourself.

Reggie died, he smoked you know.

He was ninety four

All that phlegm, choked him in the end.

He was ninety four

Clogged up his arteries.

He was ninety four.

Even the positive thinkers and white knights are run through with it. What on earth must you have done in a past life to warrant such misfortune on your head? So life is not allowed to be tragic. Your deserved shame bought it down on you and every blow of life is thus just recompense.

Every body gets what they deserve.

This compulsive shaming is Yahweh moonlighting as Mammon, his secret denied self. Like Nice Man George from the song by Madness who sells newspapers by day and steals underwear from washing lines by night, Mammon’s job is to get you to feel bad about yourself. Bad enough to warrant multi-billion dollar pharma giants to feed Him.

Ostensibly, Mammon is the God of Money and Avarice, but he has degrees of subtlety about him, where it’s more about attitude than what you actually have..

”such goods as one does not need but holds as treasure.’ M Luther.

and even more trixy with this..

”Mammon causes guilt and shame for the treasures that we do have.” C. Dollar

Who are you to shine?

and so the taint of persecutory anxiety.

which is also your fault.

But of course the ultimate form of shaming is random death. Nothing quite like a senseless killing, murders that are allowed to happen, cuts to services that mean an early grave, to make a statement of unworthiness. Life held in the balance, not because you are a threat, but to show that you are not a person anymore.

which is why the most effective way to meet Mammon wherever you may find him is with your own self worth and unshamed humanity.

If you liked this article and want to explore my books, you can type the titles ‘Abundant Delicious’ or ‘Going Mad to Stay Sane’ into the search bar for descriptions and sales.

 

 

Santa Muerta.

A new divine figure has recently emerged in the poorest barios of Mexico City, Santa Muerta, our lady, the Saint of Death. Apparently She has the power to heal sins that even God cannot forgive, which is why she is so popular in the rougher ends of town.

Now, what is a sin that God can’t forgive?

One he commits himself.

What might that be, one wonders…? You know, given that He is without stain?

Yeah, except that one of his Exclusive Attributes is that he’s the only registered divinity with a washpot, a recepticle for, er.. bathroom leavings..

Moab is my washpot; over Edom will I cast out my shoe’. Psalms 108;9

and for what does Yahweh require entire nations like ancient Moab, to serve such purposes?

Well, a sin that the washpot is for…

Yep, so Santa Muerta is actually soaking up stuff that God can’t  live with in himself let alone forgive in others.

Exactamente. She  responds to that which seems to bind all the other deadly sins together. Depersonalisation, strangely the brainchild of Yahweh himself whose primary modus vivendi is to smite at the slightest show of autonomy in his Bride,  actively depersonalising her. People become chattle and washpots.

Its serious because putting a child’s use to you over and above its welfare is a form of wickedness.

And when its done to splurge pent up feelings or experiences unfinished from elsewhere its worse.

And when I can’t talk to Me, the child-as-object becomes the default position.

The value of the child is lodged in being-of-service, rather than just being.

And the service is to participate in a deluded system that says its more important to be special than it is to be loved.

And that is why it’s a sin in any language you like because it actively attacks the spiritual self of the other.

In the name of love……

The narcissistic encounter requires the active use of sado-masochistic witholding and invasive projective identification. This is inherently depersonalizing because it is specifically designed to attack the self of the other whose value is reduced to the extent they can be bent into a prefered shape.

What Yahweh did with Moab in a single symbolic gesture also gets played out to  with Job whom Yahweh enviously attacks precisely because he is a good man.

Not much incentive to do as your told, hey?

Yeh, an’ ya had a go at Job for nuffink, cos he ain’t done nuffink to you an it was only cos Baelza betted you couldn’t make him say a bad fing, but you knew he was alright cos of the divine omniscience fingy and fucked with his head loads..

Yeh, burned his house down, killed everybody..

Wot, for nuffin, he hadn’t done anyfing bad…

Nop. Job and Mrs Job were totally good.

So he was just torturing them to see what they would do…

Well, he already knew that so he was just torturing them…

Cos  Baelza bet him..

yeh

So he proved himself to Baelza.

yeh

and took his coin.